First time Spelunking!

I started blogging a couple of months after I had my first spelunking adventure (I say 'first' because I may actually be crazy enough to do this again). The reason I signed up for it...other than happily agreeing to follow my friend Suzi just about anywhere including the deepest depths of an abyss...turns out literally......but actually I signed up to face one of my lifetime phobias. One I've struggled with throughout my childhood...a deathly fear of dark, closed and/or crowded spaces. 

Voila! It so happens that I documented my thoughts from that spelunking experience within the immediate twenty four hours following the adventure, to share with friends and family on Facebook. 

It makes sense to add this onto my blog. 

TaDA!! A flash back to my spelunking adventure from September 2013:

"Spelunking or cave discovering I have learned is by far the craziest adventure I’ve signed up for in my life-EVER…YET!! I don’t think I would have ever imagined that I’d have a day where I’d repeatedly announce over a period of several hours my eternal gratitude for the discovery of a helmet. Thank goodness indeed for the helmet…and also thank goodness for the solid plastic knee pads (whatever those are officially called?)!! 

Of course I didn’t realize I’d signed up for eight plus hours (that’s right! Eight+ hours!!) of non-stop crawling, squeezing or reptile like slithering of my body through all kinds of uneven, tight, small, dark, slippery wet and icy cold spaces within our planet. 

Who knew my spine and neck could even withstand all of this (go figure!) or that I could actually use nothing more than my stomach and mere willpower to move me through those tight scary spaces at times when all my limbs were twisted and entrapped like a broken ragged doll in a very tight box. 

Well so much for facing my fear of crowded, closed or dark spaces! Done! 

Claustrophobic no more!! 

Happy to announce that!!

Highlights included playing earth worm for eight hours in that wet sticky clay like mud that we were crawling through the entire time; having our tummies and faces dipped into icy cold pools of water (my friend refers to those as 'ice-kaka pools'...kaka I think stands for sh*t from other languages. Yikes!!).

The occasional ultra-smooth slippery spaces that had us convinced we were going to fall and plumage to our deaths any minute (as there were some dark endless scary pits around for real!); to our fingers and toes being numb from the cold, while our teeth were clattering away incessantly on and off while we waited for the others in turns to squeeze through the same holes anxiously while listening to their screams, cries and curses…BIG YIKES!!

Ah! And the young twenty something year olds who looked like Abercrombie ad-models all signed out and abandoned us after the first few hours. To be fair there was some bits of blood and tears involved here! 

And- Me!!? I was perfectly happy to tuck my tail under so to speak too and quietly follow behind but my brave friend Suzi would have none of that! Bless her soul! Thank goodness for our guide Darwin too (for his patience...knowledge...)... for ensuring we came out of this in one piece with all our body parts intact still. 

Thank goodness for sunlight and bright open spaces! Oh wait! I’m digressing! 

Highlights also included being tied to a rope (in case we slipped off and broke our jaws…who needs teeth anyway!?) while being let down or climbing back up a heart pounding thirty feet drop into eternal darkness; Well! Talk about a fast lesson in rock climbing! What with wet muddy shoes, icy-cold slippery surfaces…and the encouraging comforting voices from friends in the darkness telling you-you can do this even after you realized your life was actually in danger! Yup! We made it!!! Eight plus hours through eerie mystical Hades!! Yup- the place really exists!!!

Today I have invisible bruises head to toe! My ribs, my pelvic bones, my arms, my neck and pretty much all surface areas of skin are a bit sensitive to sunlight and touch!! Also I can't seem to scrub the smell of mother earth's guts out of me, regardless of aromatic soaps or number of showers....and my eyesight is still adjusting back to the concept of daylight-proper....Yet I feel like the Indian Indiana Jones! Fears conquered and alive to talk about it!! YAY!!!"-

AND...YES I totally recommend experiencing this at least once in your lifetime - and if you're lucky go with a true Indiana Jones style spirited guide like Darwin....but please do NOT try this without a guide regardless! 

KIDS- DO NOT TRY THIS ALONE! 

Links to pictures from this trip added below. Although after the first four hours we forgot to diligently take pictures to document things like the thirty feet drop (which requires a separate write up in itself- the near-death life experience and drop etc.)- understandably. We focused instead on staying alive and other silly priorities like that. GULP! 

https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10201897146608831.1073741845.1188765488&type=1&l=99089ca3e8

Summer-Movin'!!

HELLO!!!! I meant to post a blog in August… but Man! Good part of this summer seems to have totally slipped by me! Then again….No! Not really! Two months were focused around coordinating a residential move! I got a lot done this summer…from searching for and finding my new place to leaving my old one etc..!

Since I’m one of those people that went from a very sheltered and controlled upbringing to a similar set-up through most of my adult married life….I seem to have spent the last few years since my separation and divorce practicing standing on my own two feet per say figuratively and profoundly. I’ve been working on finding my voice, my thoughts, my entire sense of self…etc. etc…and it’s all going very well!! :-)

Since I’ve been blessed with a new chance at living….I could relate to 'Little Mermaid' standing on magical mother earth for the first time with her two initially wobbly but soon to be fabulously strong legs.  BIG YAY!! Strong legs I have found too thank goodness!!...And speaking of fairytales… I can also relate to Goldilocks’ experiences with testing out the three bear’s habitat. Getting started a few years ago I first moved into a fully furnished place which I loved but it didn’t feel right, then I moved into my first apartment the second year which I filled up with basic semi-functional (as in it looks good but breaks easily) Ikea furnishings….it felt comfortable but really not quite there….then this time….finally I moved into a small townhouse…which all clichés aside… it really does feel like home…in an incredibly cozy and spiritual sense! Grateful so much! Like Goldie loving all that belonged to little bear this little house fits me so perfectly right here right now! <3

I tackled my move a bit uniquely. First I spent a couple of weeks prior to the move getting rid of all my furniture and most of my physical belongings. Scary but liberating too…that when you closely evaluate everything in your space you quickly realize that you really don’t need much of it after all…Go figure!.…I deemed this my ‘Feng-Shui project’!  This process was intense and interesting mentally and physically …surprisingly reflective, draining, uplifting and totally cleansing in every imaginable way.…helping me to let go of lots more than I realized. Going through stuff I discovered old letters from my now deceased mother and from my ex which were like finding windows into my soul..almost literally… It helped shed a few tears over baggage I didn’t even realize I was carrying in the first place. What a privilege of an experience it’s been! I found a lot of peace through the process for sure!

Then came the next project of refurnishing my new space from scratch with a strict budget...which was of course exhausting and challenging but also incredibly illuminating and refreshing for my soul.

This project held new found intrigue and obsession for me as I was inspired to fill my home with things that I carefully and thoughtfully picked out piece by piece. Interesting that I have never taken such dedication towards setting up a home before! Go figure! I have decided that everyone should experience caring about setting up a physical home space at least once in their lifetime…and I am glad for this experience! I realized I wanted my furniture to have purpose...as in to feel inviting... to say ‘come, sit, relax and talk to me’…versus…it just serves it’s very basic purpose.….just because it does!!...You know what I mean!!?

Crazy thing is that somewhere deep down I think I was curious to see what I would create…what colors or theme I would choose and why, what wall décor would best represent who I am becoming…..It even left me rather anxious… to see the final outcome….as if I was unveiling my own soul layer by layer in the process….as if in the end I would find a mirror to peek into…to find myself….to find me who was once lost and now found…. Wondering how could I have gotten through so many years allowing myself to not know who I am really or what I want to stand for..…Yup it sounds odd but the house felt like a significant project for this stage of my life.

Interestingly enough yesterday as I placed one of the last pieces of décor onto the wall I asked my son his opinion on it…and he said he loved it. I was relieved as I said ‘Ok so it’s not crazy then!’ To this he responded ‘OH but of course it’s crazy Mom…and daring even….which is perfect…because it represents you… it suits your personality.’ What an odd thing to hear from my eleven year old! LOL!

The coolest thing too is that in finding myself….I am also finding many of my soul friends and family who share my values…many it turns out even live in my new neighborhood.…what an incredibly luxurious blessing! Amazing that people and places I feel are starting to reflect back my daily choices….to promote comfort, peace, love and harmony. I can’t believe there was a time when I believed nothing mattered…to now when I believe that everything does.…and absolutely Everyone! Now more than ever my gratitude list never ceases to grow or amaze me. I am home!

Loving-living- life-inspired!
Namaste! XO