Upgrade or Settle!?

Recently I find myself pondering over just how much our overly commercialized culture here in the US pushes towards constant upgrades versus settlements. In fact the very word ‘settling’ carries so much baggage, social judgement and negative connotations already. I’m left wondering how much we’ve internalized this way of thinking and at what point does it define who we are as individuals even?

Window shopping is a way of life for us….keep looking and keep buying knowing you can get fully refunded if you change your mind-Right? & The choices are endless and tempting! After all who doesn’t want to keep believing there’s something bigger and better waiting for us just around the corner.…just there for the taking…the bigger house, the fancier car, the more satisfying job, the better lover…and even the better you! We’re seemingly always a few steps away from making it all a bit more perfect-No?

Regardless there is little need for commitments in our lives since so much is ok to return if we’re not 100% satisfied-Right? Culturally there is even the fall back option for suing when things don’t go as promised. Of course for me this begs the question that does this constant chase for something else leave us ever actually truly satisfied? When we get what we want do we stop to enjoy it or do we feel the anxiety buildup inside egging us to run away before feeling trapped or suffocated by the ‘great’ only to risk losing the ‘greater’ that is perhaps elsewhere waiting for our picking? 

During my travels to other countries and cultures sometimes this difference in folks around me is almost palpable; I have to say I see less of this need to keep the search constantly going. People seem to be actually ‘settling’…(Imagine that!)….for the beautiful house, the fancy ride or that amazing significant other and they seem thrilled and grateful to have gotten there. They don’t seem to feel the need to continue looking for more once they’ve reached their important goals and needs. They seem instead to nurture, grow and cherish on what they have already built….to make a home, to create a family, to strengthen their relationships with friends and neighbors; I see folks care for and truly relish on what they have accomplished. Is that such a terrible thing? 

Beyond just my speculation in the presence of such folks it’s hard not to enjoy a shared energy of happiness and contentment that they have mastered via settling….they seem to approach life in strides peacefully accepting the ups and downs also as part of their journey with the loving support of a strong network of loved ones around them that they have invested in mutually. Seems this definitely leaves them with more space within for something grander….to be present and to actually enjoy the moment they are in perhaps.

I realize that the rat race will always go on with or without us. Sometimes it totally makes sense to jump in and run with it, to find our place or mark in it too….but perhaps it’s also important to know when not to lose sight of the original goal within the mayhem-No!?

For me it took the sudden death of a parent to separate what matters from what’s just distractions along my path….for everyone else out there I send out prayers always to get us all there to what matters sooner and easier.

Find your Chi! Namaste! XO

Learning-Living-Life-Inspired! <3 XO :-)

About the Giving Tree

The Giving Tree. ....I read that book to my son a few years ago. It was my first time reading it. It left me disturbed when it was done. My son was very upset by it too.  It resonated so deeply for me because all my life I was taught in my upbringing to be just like that hopeless and naive tree always giving completely without holding back or ever complaining about it even as it’s being stripped away towards a seemingly bitter end and being totally cool with it. - But is that really what it means to be a good person!!? I no longer agree with it!!

I still believe that true happiness lies in giving and putting others ahead of me....but I've changed in the last few years and so has my perspective. I now believe in giving and getting respect, in setting healthy boundaries that allow me to grow while being the best I can be for myself and for others. I see clearly now that by being true to myself and taking care of me I actually have more to give back after all.

Sometimes in life we find ourselves in situations or around people who are toxic for us. These are people who will attack us even for our finest core qualities, belittling us and clouding our better judgement. I've been there too often in life not realizing it's OK to acknowledge my own needs and feelings since I was too preoccupied with pleasing others and fearing rejection from the masses. You see being the people pleaser I am by nature and nurture this left me in my past much like that giving tree too often too broken and too stumped with nothing left to offer anyone. No not me no more!!

I have learned since to stand up for me and to not justify those who cause me harm whether their behavior results from obvious ill will or from careless oblivious intentions. You see I no longer do things to be a people pleaser; I now do things for people because it pleases me to do so. In caring for myself I have learned the art of better caring for others. I honor the spaces in me that demand untangling from hurt and chaos.

I am grateful that I have learned to give and operate within healthy boundaries and even more grateful to benefit from the fruits of this priceless understanding already. I wish someone had told me this earlier on my journey but then again it’s never too late to learn the great lessons. I pray for others to learn this much faster and easier than I did. Respect yourself! Be true to you!

Namaste!! Love, Peace and Light to ALL. XO <3

Life and Love!

Yes I am daring to share thoughts…my work-in-progress, still-in-process, newly-forming- infancy-stage …thoughts on these two biggest subjects we encounter in our universe during this lifetime…even kind of piecing them together! Lol! After-all…. ‘learning-living-life-inspired’….is to share what I learn and what I am still learning - See!?

Life! Took me way too long to see that it was never meant to be painful and difficult but that it is a gift- a truly precious and wonderful gift! As infants we start off with such great attitude… non-judgmental, without-expectations and easily in-awe of most things….then come the years and with those the experiences…which build diverse looking invisible walls all around us.…turning us into these uniquely designed magnificent works of art I guess….as if each one of us is made for and left demanding to be appreciated, understood and decoded all over again somehow….Right?

How to describe Life!? I remember learning Latin in university and reading ‘Cena Trimalchionis’ in this ancient fantastic language…translating this entire chapter which is dedicated to describing an outrageous, extravagant, lavish, opulent and insane feast that this dude throws for his guests- Right? It is such a huge chapter that it can easily present itself as a small novel all by itself…it’s the only book I know of that spends that much time indulging in such grandiose details about the food displayed and the entertainment offerings at a party. Put it this way: it easily makes the infamous Great Gatsby's parties sound like a trip to McDonald’s! What if we could describe life as such a feast….it would turn out I imagine more dramatic than Dante’s Inferno, more ostentatious and grotesque than Trimalchio’s feast, and definitely more creative than the description of heaven by all accounts of religious and philosophical books’ put together even…and still we would probably fall short in describing it somehow!! Life is this crazy cool phenomenal party.….Think about it....if you’re too shy you will miss out, if you’re too loud it may work against you….Important to have fun, but also to be careful….Eat the wrong things and it may make you sick…eat too much and you will regret it….drink too much and Oh Man! Who knows where that will take you…Life! It is a celebration and learning to balance yourself through it is no easy feat! Naturally!!

So here is an epiphany I had today.….and it’s about Love! What if Love too is just like Life! Not only to be celebrated but more importantly that perhaps it is never meant to be anything less than AMAZING too!!? For me in the past it’s always been a complex negative subject you see.…always so troubled and often leaving me at such a loss….a subject that felt painfully lacking in my story in general…and even now feels like a total stranger to me oddly….given the years I have lived I suppose; ‘Lacking!?’….I could say mostly in the romantic department….but in fact it really runs deeper and older than that if you know what I mean. So Love! What if we could write a book to describe it too…I guess it would be potentially even more colorful and overwhelming than our description of life…perhaps!? I imagine this book would be truly GRAND!!! I remember once writing about kisses; I was so young and I said ‘I could write an entire bible on his kisses... dedicating each chapter to the nature of each touch’…..and that is how I had felt just about kisses….so what about Love!?

Recently I came to the following realization: I came to understand that those who contributed most profoundly towards my feeling so lacking in love….had actually in their own ways done their best for me always.…even when I just couldn't see it…..and in seeing this I found my peace with it….I can actually feel myself settling quietly inside.….as an ocean settles it’s tides after a terrifying storm…..finding peace….it’s a great thing getting here!

Had to share it! This new idea that popped up today! If Life is meant to be amazing then Love too is perhaps meant to be amazing! Not conflicted or dark or wrong...(another story for another day)…or suffocating and controlling...(perhaps yet another story for another day too...Lol!)…but I am starting to sense it....that Love is….when we are ready to let it in…totally clear and beautiful….I suddenly see that similar to Life…perhaps also with Love I have been just going about it all wrong! You know what I mean!?

Learning-Living-Life-Inspired's message today is: For those lucky ones amongst us who found that special someone to share their love with-Absolutely celebrate it! Bask away in all its glory! & For those of us still fumbling our way towards Love- hang on tight! When we find the 'one' it will be more than worth it! It’s going to be magically AMAZING too! I believe now!!

That's Me!! Learning-Living-Life-Inspired! NAMASTE!! <3

Mirrors!!

Photo by: Julie De Waroquier (i.e. a lucky web surfing run in)

I haven’t been writing as much recently. Not because of lack of inspiration but that my reaction to this life and the world around me often leaves me in such a deep state of awe that it’s almost too much to process and put into words. Life! What an enchanting journey! What a truly incredibly beautiful blessing! So often taken so for granted! We operate with such small perspectives….but maybe that is the true magic of it all.....perhaps much like newborns, knowing nothing, we spend all of our lives in a state of grand discovery…..we laugh and we cry.…with each step we take we begin to trust in ourselves… learning to walk and then to dance…to love and then to be free….all the while discovering everything that’s amazing around us….and all done in so many cute and clumsy small steps and profound doses.

Recently I remembered a moment from my past and unimaginably so it hasn't even been five years since…..but it seems like another life time ago at least....I remembered a ghost of my own past at the end of a tight rope.….so completely broken and defeated, lying on the floor, bawling her eyes out in utter despair, her head was so dark and so lost as she wished she had never existed...hating her life…and she felt engulfed in pain, hatred and fear….she had no voice inside her to help her fight back… she hadn’t realized yet that the prison around her had become too weak to hold her in….she had been there so long she had stopped even trying…you see? I remembered this wish in her heart in that bleak moment wanting only for everything to end. Did I know then that it would be the last time in my life I would ever feel that way!!? I was about to change everything! The ghost of my past was about to break all the shackles that held her there!

That moment on this journey in retrospect was significant as some moments just are- more so than others! That memory for me now felt sad and odd!... Odd….because I couldn't relate to that person at all… Sad…..because I felt a powerful urge to reach back into the past, to lift up this woman who was so spiritually broken and wrecked on the floor and share with her the ultimate secret!

I wanted to tell her ‘My poor dear!  You are going about it all wrong! Life was never intended to be like that! Life is meant to be amazing!  You have no idea! You are meant to grow and build your spirit….you are meant to open your eyes and your heart to discover the magic all around you! Live-learn-love life! SEE all the wonderful people who exist around you.….because when you’re ready to look every one of them will hold up a bright and colorful lantern to light up your path and they will encouragingly smile as you pass through….into this enchanted time and space given to you. I wanted to tell her to never forget that life is a journey of discovery of all that’s unspeakably grand and beautiful! I wanted to tell her ‘Oh Man! You are going to love this ride! Just hold tight!!’

My blog doesn't share my entire story….which one day it just might….but when I started it I wished to share, as I still do, the simplest and grandest messages I have learned that have changed everything for me! We all have moments that may seem bleak and that’s when it’s most important to remember….every person you meet, knowingly or unknowingly, holds a lantern to help you pass, or lends a hand to guide you, or places a stepping stone before you…..when we are ready to look we will find mirrors in every stranger’s eyes. Don’t forget to look and don’t forget there is no prison your spirit cannot break through!

Learning-Living-Life- Inspired’s message today is: Smile for the people around you! & Enjoy your specially designed enchanted ride….whatever you do…..don’t close your eyes and miss the magic!!!! NAMASTE!!

P.S. I like this quote from Carl Jung: The unconscious is not just evil by nature, it is also the source of the highest good: not only dark but also light, not only bestial, semi-human, and demonic but superhuman, spiritual, and, in the classical sense of the word, "divine."

Reflection Ritual 2014/2015

I believe that every individual should take time at the end of a year to perform reflection rituals to honor past experiences, achievements and lessons learned over the previous annual cycle. I like to imagine myself waving bye to the previous year with tears and smiles as if I’m about to cross over a threshold at an airport check-in station, excitedly also preparing to embark on a new adventurous journey ahead…..I am filled with hope and a sense of ‘anything is possible’ wonderment about where we’re heading next even as I sense tremendous gratitude and peace about where we've been already and perhaps sadness too for what we may be unknowingly leaving behind also.

Happy Son in Dubai! PEACE!!! <3

I am convinced over the last few years that each year gets even better than the one prior! There is greater enlightenment awaiting us with every step! 2014 is no exception! It wasn't all smiles and laughs by any means….yet every experience was profound and I always knew that I was fittingly exactly where I was meant to be every step of the way.

Key experiences and lessons this year included acceptance of what is…..from the pain of seeing loved ones suffer from aging and sickness ….to …seeing a soul family inspiration-ally cope in extraordinary ways united in dealing with difficult stages of life,….to learning to let go of what was not meant to be,…to seeing the miraculous healing powers of forgiveness,….to experiencing continuous amazing transitions….. personally from my move to a new home, a new town and mostly from watching my son find peace and blossom at his new school especially after struggling for so many years with his parents’ separation/divorce. One universal message remained unwaivering in my psyche…..the knowledge that we are never alone and that love envelops us…..always gently smiling and welcoming us to tune in!

GRATEFUL! BIG TIME! THANK YOU 2014! & WISHING EVERYONE A PHENOMENALLY MAGICAL YEAR AHEAD!!! PEACE! LOVE! HAPPINESS!!!

CHEERS & WELCOME 2015!!

How does one share an entire year in pictures! So many fabulous memories to choose from that I am incredibly grateful for! Here are some random ones (not necessarily in chronological order for the year) I will treasure forever from my life in 2014!

Thanks for sharing this amazing life journey together!!! XOXO

Although 2014 didn't leave time enough for us to walk the same continent together I continue to be eternally grateful for my soul-mate sister who is always right beside me every step of the way through all our laughs, tears and 'AHA!' moments!

First Car Camping Trip- March 2014

Another long awaited family reunion in Dubai 

A continuously expanding soul family = Several Heart Warming & Fun Gatherings-=Thank Goodness!! 

Family Day at the pool- Dubai

First visit to MEXICO!!! YAY!!!

Jumping Into & Swimming in Cenotes! More bucket list items down!!! 

Finding a new friend and soul sister to share new adventures with @ Chichen Itza!! <3

Grateful to my soul family for celebrating another birthday with me and making it extra special

Pure Love, Pure Bliss-=More Family to love!!!

More celebrations on and off the trails :-)

Hike & Meditation with great friends = Best 4th of July Ever!!!

Thankful for spending more time with this lovely soul sister! 

Best office Party Ever!! 1920's Themed at National Building Museum in D.C!! 

Thanksgiving with Soul Family is becoming a fabulous tradition! <3

A Magical Morning in November on the most spiritual lake I know!!

There were many amazing experiences in nature -countless gorgeous hikes, jumping into surreal cenotes in the Mexican jungles, swimming in the oceans bordering Mexico, Dubai or even locally etc..there were indeed many adventures along the way....- all year long......and thank goodness there were many new bonds of friendship created and older bonds of friendship strengthened....every step of the way.....leaving incredibly priceless memories to treasure for life!!

WHAT AN INCREDIBLY FANTASTIC LIFE IT IS!! <3

Holiday Reminiscing!!!

The Holiday season didn't always feel as cheery for me as it does this year! YAY!!! Grateful!!

For many years the holidays left me feeling too nostalgic…even sad and lost…as it resurfaced memories from India of Christmas’ spent with my beloved now-deceased grandma and with  my dear brother, my ultra-fun aunts and uncles- all of whom I had gotten separated from over three decades ago. 

Then in 2008- Christmas brought new anxiety with a phone call that changed everything! I learned that my mother suddenly passed away unexpectedly but worse that it had already been at least three days since her death but none of us had even realized it. The entire family was shocked, shaken and devastated!

I spent that Christmas Eve and the following day in a haze flying back to India alone, leaving my young son behind with his dad in Montreal. I hadn’t been back to India in decades! I wasn’t going to make it to the funeral but all of me just knew that it was time to go ….to that long awaited reunion with my family. You see I had spent too many delusional years believing that I was all alone and that all the ties and connections from my past were forever lost in time and space… believing this stupid saying that ‘there is no going back!’ But that’s so WRONG! The past, the present and the future-are all tied together and very much tangible within us! That reunion with my family in 2008 was the beginning to discovering all that matters-for me!

Now lo-and-behold- here we are at the end of 2014 and I can’t be more grateful or more in awe of where life has carried me since….or the peace and joy that I finally find in everything and everyone. Somehow something so tragic led me to a life I love and appreciate completely! It’s mind blowing, understanding all the blessings that are granted to each of us daily. It’s an amazing universe! An incredible world!-And OH-MY-GOSH! Indeed a precious gift of a life!

My holiday season feels very different this year! My heart feels…blatantly….unapologetically cheery!? Almost! I caught myself feeling a bit guilty for it….especially given the horrors in the news..…asking if it’s ok to feel this? It seems I cannot help sensing a profound sense of love, peace and joy in the universe all around us and it is superseding any and all pain and sadness…which I do understand also exists in varying degrees and times throughout all our lives..….But thank goodness there is this understanding too that it’s not only ok but actually important even to honor and celebrate life in all its glory! The holidays are meant for this!

So- I have learned that the holidays can be tricky….until you make peace with all that truly matters!

For this holiday season-I wish the following for everyone everywhere….I hope you feel like a child watching jaw-dropping fireworks for the first time,…..like you’re dancing to beautiful music that lifts up your spirit all the way to the sun, the moon and the stars,….I hope your heart sings like a poet falling in love….to the many harmonious beats of the universe….and that you find yourself whistling tunes aloud without reason when you wake up each magical day…..I pray that each of us shares and spreads the grandiose feelings of love, peace and joy that is meant to mark the beauty of this season….and that you can capture and preserve it inside you for now and for always! HAPPY HOLIDAY SEASON EVERYONE!!! Sending you all fantastic vibes!! CHEERS!!! <3

HAPPY HOLIDAYS & HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! <3

Healing Affirmations!

We all know that the right affirmations can be freeing and healing in incredibly magical ways so I try to practice it regularly.

Gratitude Affirmations! Those are my go-to ones and my list is endless! Thank Goodness!! No pun intended but you see the pattern-right? Lol! Whether I credit it to my nature or nurture it’s somehow always there….perhaps it’s because my life experiences as a female began in India and then the Middle East before migrating off to the US in my late teens….so I don’t take much for granted….whether being able to go out of the house without covering up head to toe, or having a career, or driving, or being able to say what I’m thinking, or even having the right to hold on to my beliefs...(let aside the many billions of other blessings that we experience with every breath every day).

However I recently stumbled upon an entirely new category of affirmations which overnight lifted a veil of darkness and pain inside me that I wasn't even aware of holding on to. Naturally I feel inspired to add this to my blog to share with everyone!  Perhaps everyone should try it!!!? These are- Forgiveness Affirmations!!

It happened a few nights ago as I was going through a random habitual gratitude list in preparation of hopefully falling into a deep slumber…when a brilliant thought snuck in somehow that I should create a forgiveness affirmations list….and even as I thought this I was telling myself that I have no one to forgive…no one I am holding grudges against….but an inner deeper voice pushed further by saying ‘but if I had people to forgive who would I forgive and why’ so I went with it. I started with ‘I forgive.…( A)… for (something)… and I wish (him/her) the best of everything sincerely deeply always’….and to my horror there was indeed a list!!! _ And worse!! My heart could barely create a sincere wish for these people on my covert list. So I tried to say it aloud to hear myself repeat the thought and OMG! Horror of horrors! I was almost choking over the sentences….making me realize that I was indeed still harboring residual anger, pain and issues around a few individuals from my past. Who knew!!! So I worked on it…repeating the affirmations softly aloud to myself over and over until it sounded natural and felt completely sincere. I finally fell into a deep restful sleep for the night.

Voila! The next morning as I was driving to work it dawned on me that I felt happier and freer than imaginable! My energy had shifted in some incredibly powerful way! As if there was an entire river inside me that was blocked and suddenly was blissfully rushing off to join the ocean. I felt almost elated! Incredible!!! Something so simple and TaDA!! Profound healing!!

So-is it possible that you too have wounds so deeply forgotten scaring your soul and holding you back in ways you didn’t even know? See- I believe that we all process experiences in very similar ways (remember my 'rainbow spectrum of emotions' analogy from a previous post?)…..and more importantly I believe that we can learn from each other….so I share hoping this helps someone else find their bliss with a simple exercise like practicing forgiveness or gratitude affirmations….or perhaps creating a whole new category….anything....just as long as it swiftly delivers for you too peace, happiness and healing! 

P.S. HAPPY HOLIDAYS to ALL!!! <3  
(& Yes- I did take these pictures of Lake Drummond...recently in November 2014. :-)